07
Let me begin by saying this. I have been in a similar situation that this young lady was in. But unlike her, I did not create the situation. It was created for me. And I probably felt just as bad as she did. The difference is that I am still here and she isn’t. Maybe age had something to do with it. Or maybe the fact that I’m not going out like that is the reason I’m still here. But either way, I feel little sympathy for her. I just DON’T!
I just read an article that stated a young girl committed suicide because of a “sexting” incident. For those of you who don’t know what “sexting” is, it’s sending sexy, nude, or pornographic pictures over your cell phone or other wireless device. This young lady sent the pictures to her then boyfriend, who after they broke up, sent those pictures to other girls, and you can bet the guys already saw them, who proceeded to make her life miserable. Miserable to the point that she hated going to school. And this is where the similarities begin.
At San Diego City College, there was a rumor that I was a lesbian. No one ever said they saw me with another woman. No one ever said they saw me do anything with any women. What was said is that I “looked” at other women. YUP, that was my crime! Not like Jack Tripper used to look at Chrissy, Janet, and Terry, just looked at them. And I endured semesters of whispers, murmurs, and pointing. And should someone not have known about my “crime“, it was quickly brought to their attention. Luckily for me, most of the people who were “told about me” didn’t seem to care. They continued to talk to me and it didn’t matter. But yes, there were times when I didn’t want to go to class. And times where I was ready to toss people off of the second floor of the building we were on. But I was in my mid twenties and saw the bigger picture. And the fact that I was usually one of the people who always “fucked up the curve“, I was able to get my revenge that way! No one had the balls to come up to my face and say anything. But the murmurs and other crap were aggravating just the same.
Fast forward to the late 90′s. I had enrolled in a Paralegal course at the University of San Diego. I figured it was a fresh start. No one would know me there I was sure. I had been out of school at least five years. Certainly I wouldn’t have to worry about that now. WRONG! Someone in a class remembered me and while there were less whispers and murmurs, suddenly I got a different vibe in a couple of my GE legal classes. Didn’t matter, I still passed the course with flying colors. My point? I know how these young people felt. And I can tell you it didn’t and still doesn’t feel good! I think being older, it allowed me to handle it better.
But here is where we differ. This young lady brought her “situation” on herself. There is a saying that you “never write something you aren’t willing to stand behind.” That same thing goes for texting, twittering, or emailing for that matter. You never send something you would be embarrassed should it get out. Obviously this young lady never heard that saying because she sent pictures of herself that came back to haunt her. I am not making light of this. A mother has lost her only child. I have lost six people in my lifetime to suicide, with the earliest being when I was in Junior High School.
Chuck was one of the sweetest people I had ever met up until that time. But he committed a crime much like I did. There were rumors that he was … GAY! At 15 years old, he committed suicide. So without knowing it, I saw this situation happen 32 years ago!
I spent 5 years working for a Teen Drug and Alcohol treatment center and saw just how cruel kids can be. And because 90% of my friends are males, both gay and straight, I have been privy to their mindset. I have heard them say things that most women will NEVER HEAR! And I can tell you, some of it isn’t always flattering. And I have been shown pictures of naked girls on the cell phones of my male friends. Hell, I had a grown ass woman sent me “sexting” pictures. Do I still have them? YES! Will I ever show them to anyone? NO! I guess that is the difference in maturity levels. To me, I see nothing to gain by doing so. So why do it! We all have to live with our choices. And I hope that karma comes back and kicks the SHIT OUT of the BOYFRIEND and the SORRY BITCHES that made this young lady’s life a living hell. And for those school officials that did nothing? I hope karma visits your PUNK ASSES TOO!
And again, I’m not making light of this young lady’s death. I just find it hard to have sympathy for her. She put herself in that situation by taking and SENDING those pictures. I used to always tell the kids enrolled n the treatment center to “not give away their power.” By sending those pictures, that young lady did just that. And as Forrest Gump said, ”stupid is as stupid does.” I just hate that her “stupidity” caused her to take her life. Sooooo, if I have offended you, OH WELL!
Comments
[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Tami Miller, Tami Miller. Tami Miller said: Wrote this post back in March 2010. Recounts my experience being "outed" in college. http://tinyurl.com/23l8jvd #lgbt #lesbian #gay #suicide [...]
Add A Comment